3 Reasons To Get Premarital Counseling Before Marrying in the Church
You may be required to get premarital counseling if you are getting married in a church. However, it may be beneficial even if you are not. Get an idea of some of the reasons you should give this kind of course a chance before your wedding.
There is the obvious reason that many churches do not allow couples to get married without first going through premarital counseling. If you plan to marry in a church, whether you are Catholic or another religion, you will need proof that you attended the required courses. This requirement scares some people away, but you should realize that this is a rather small commitment to have to make since it typically only lasts a few hours total. Some churches feature a short course that is spread out over several weeks, while others have a program that takes a single day or weekend. But either way, it is a small price to pay to get married in the church of your choice.
In fact, if your soon-to-be spouse refuses to go through the premarital counseling, you may be given a glimpse at just how much he or she is devoted to the religion and the relationship. Your partner should be willing to put in a few hours or even a weekend if it means you can get married in a church. If he or she will not do so, you may realize that your partner is not as devoted to the religion as you thought. You may also see that he or she is not willing to sacrifice some time to work on your relationship, which can be scary to realize just before your wedding. If so, you may want to rethink your plans to marry until you can be sure of your partner’s commitment to the relationship.
Of course, premarital counseling just plain improves any marriage. You will be able to learn more about each other, and get some tips on making the relationship even better. In addition, you will have an excuse to spend time together without distractions that include the television or internet. This allows you a chance to discuss your wedding plans and any fears or doubts you have, since the environment of the premarital counseling session should be ideal for this kind of sharing.
There are clearly various reasons to schedule your session. Whether or not you go through with it, you will learn a little more about your partner. Of course, completing the session will surely allow you to learn more than if you skip it and decide not to get married in the church after all.
What Not to Wear Despite a Casual Dress Code
When you have been invited to attend a social function and the invitation is marked as ‘casual dress’ there are simply some items of clothing for females and males that are simply not suitable attire to wear outside your home. It is unfortunate that today too many people simply don’t look at themselves in a mirror to see themselves before venturing outside into the public arena.
There are items like Pyjamas -whether you are male or female – that simply belong in a bedroom. Yet I have seen people wander off into the public gaze dressed in a pair of PJ bottoms or singlets as they go to get the morning newspaper or some milk. These views are not attractive. It may be a casual outing but this is simply something that your partner alone should be privy to.
Females:
Female casual dress today is usually jeans and a T-shirt or a shirt. The more attractive is a feminine blouse. What is not acceptable clothing attire is a too-revealing blouse that leaves nothing to a male’s imagination. Wearing a Tee shirt that allows your boobs to fall out or your nipples to show through is not attractive. Males may stare and not be capable of a conversation with you while looking in your eyes – making them totally incapable of talking above your chest.
Being in a mixed social environment this becomes embarrassing for everyone around you. Be kind to your male hosts and their male guests by dressing less revealingly. Your partner may enjoy your attributes but would no doubt prefer it if you didn’t share his view with all his mates.
Wearing a very short skirt to a casual dress social function is not a good idea either. Firstly, there are very few women who have ‘the legs’ to make the wearing of a very short skirt attractive. Any skirt or dress length that is 4 or more inches above the knees limits a woman’s ability to sit nicely without showing a lot of outer or inner thigh area. Any person sitting opposite or walking in front of you is likely to ‘cop an eye full’ of your feminine attributes. This is embarrassing to all concerned and annoying to a female hostess.
If you have received an invitation from someone from a different culture, then dress with their sensibilities in mind. One of the more common no-no’s for women are bare shoulders.
Men and Women should refrain from wearing hipster jeans – especially if they are too tight.
Wearing any hipster jeans to a casual dress code situation is not a good idea unless you want to show your bum crack every time you bend over to do something. Believe me, this tends to put people off their food and is not a tantalizing look.
We All Need These Kinds of People In Our Lives!
A few weeks ago I came home from a long weekend away. The first thing my daughters said to me was that our dog went bonkers. Translation: Our dog was ripping and running through the house, sliding across the hardwood floors on all fours! It would not have been such a big deal except that Judah is a 100-lb., 3 1/2 foot tall Doberman pinscher. Judah is a little over 2 years old and still full of puppy. Doberman Pinschers are considered a working breed. They like to run-fast! So imagine a bull in a china shop and you get the picture in our house.
My response was. “Has anyone taken Judah to the park to run since I have been gone.” The reply was a simple and quick, “No.” So, the next morning, I took Judah to the park and we walked for about 3.5 miles – Judah ran most of the way. He stopped periodically, looked back and once I was in view he darted off again. If you have ever seen a Doberman pinscher run, it’s a beautiful sight; a picture of strength and finesse. When it was time to go, Judah followed me to the car, hopped in and immediately laid down. He was exhausted, spent and yet content. He has not ripped through the house since! Judah just needed to be himself and what is innately Doberman.
The same goes for us. We just need to be ourselves and what is intrinsic to the purpose for which God created us. Like Judah, the frustration comes when we are prevented from being who God created us to be. But when we are permitted to be ourselves there is nothing more exhilarating and satisfying. Taking a page out of Judah’s book, what do we see?
First, Judah had a family that generally cared about him. Judah also had someone within that family who cared about him more specifically. This person assumed greater interest and responsibility for Judah’s wellbeing. This person knew and understood the needs distinctive to the Doberman dog breed and ensured those needs were met. While all of the family members were capable of providing basic needs like food and water and did provide for these needs regularly, this person had a special affinity for Judah and it showed. She not only knew his specific needs as a Doberman, but also acted on her knowledge. Dobermans are active dogs. They need to work and they need a person to protect. They need to run and exercise and they also need a challenge. The person that provided opportunities to meet these additional needs is unique to Judah. Hence, a bond is formed. This person was attentive and responsive in facilitating Judah being who he was. She gave Judah a time, place and space to happen. With her Judah was very alive. And all who were in the park that day commented so.
Second, general family members only saw the problems associated with Judah ripping and running through the house. Their answer was to contain Judah by ordering him to his room. But this special family member saw Judah’s need to run. The next day, she created an opportunity for him to do exactly that. That evening other family members remarked on Judah’s calm demeanor.
We need to be ourselves. We need a time, place and space to happen. Typically, this begins with people. Biological families and intentional families like your local church, work or volunteer organizations are all opportunities for us to happen. Within the family there are many members, all of whom are capable of providing for the basic needs of any one individual. I Corinthians 12:12 reads,
“The human body has many parts, but the many parts make up one whole body. So it is with the body of Christ.”
Those needs include love, truth and grace. Everyone in the family has been given these things in Christ and therefore should offer them regularly as others have need for it. Consider Jesus’ command to the disciples in John 13:34 and 35,
“So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”
Ephesians 4:15 and 16 adds this,
“Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.”
Still within the family, whether biological or intentional, there are those to whom God has assigned you to pay special attention, as well as those whom God has assigned to pay special attention to you. These individuals have a God-given affinity for you. They express a different level of interest in you. They seem more responsive to you. They attend to you in prayer, word and deed. They go the extra mile for you and are willingly inconvenienced for you. They choose you, often before you choose them.
The truth is, we all need family. We all need love, truth and grace. But in addition we need those special people that hear our heart when it is at odds with our mind and activity. We need those that God has ordained to walk with us, talk with us, encourage us and make things happen for us that we fulfill our destiny. We all need help to fulfill our God-given purpose. We all need those special people in our lives that always believe the best about us, turn our lemons into lemonade and otherwise help us keep it moving!
The Story of Paul’s Letter to the Galatians
It started over a plate of food.
In the city of Antioch, followers of Jesus were getting to know each other. People from different cultures, who had previously stayed as far as possible out of each other’s way, discovered that they had much in common. The Gospel brought them together. They talked about the kingdom of God and the freedom that Jesus Christ brought them. What better place to get to know each other, than over a dinner table! Among them were well known church leaders, like Peter, Paul and Barnabas.
But suddenly, there was a disturbance. Some friends of the apostle James had just arrived from Jerusalem.
Standing in the doorway and looking around, they frowned upon the warm gathering of believers. Something was clearly not in their liking: Jews and non-Jews eating together! This flew in the face of all their traditions and laws.
Suddenly, the apostles Peter and Barnabas got up from their table and took their plates of food with them. They went to sit down with the friends of James. Now there were two groups of people, two tables: a Jewish group and a non-Jewish group.
Only one Jew remained on the non-Jewish table: the apostle Paul. He also got up, but left his plate behind. He had something urgent to tell Peter in such a way that all could hear: “Peter! Jesus Christ loved us all and died for us all on the cross, Jews and non-Jews. If anyone believes in Him, He takes that person’s sins away. So we know our Jewish law can’t reconcile us with God, neither can it separate believers from each other! So, why are you suddenly pretending that you are not a friend of non-Jews by not eating with them? And do you really think it’s a good idea to force non-Jews to do everything in the Jewish law?”
When Paul went back to finish his dinner, everybody had something to think about. Only by believing in Jesus Christ and fully accepting each other, are we giving God’s grace its rightful place. This is the New Covenant. The Promise came true.
* * *
From Champion of the Law to Servant of Grace
More than seventeen years before that day, Paul (also called Saul) was quite a different man. He wasn’t a servant of grace, but a champion of the works of the law.
Since the day he stood by approvingly when one of the first deacons of the church, Stephen, was killed, he fought the faith in Jesus Christ. With an authorization letter from the Jewish leaders in his hand, he had the power to apprehend and imprison Christians everywhere.
It was only a short while since the Lord Jesus Christ had been crucified in Jerusalem and Saul of Tarshish, one of the party of the Pharisees who rejected Jesus as the Christ, was travelling the road from Jerusalem to Damascus in Syria to make sure no followers of Jesus remained in that city.
The Lord Jesus once told His followers: “if anyone accepts you, it’s as good as if he accepted Me and if anyone rejects you, it’s as good as if he rejected Me”. Saul was on his way to apprehend followers of Jesus, thinking that the Lord was dead. In his mind, he was doing God’s will to uphold the Law. Suddenly, the Lord whom he thought was dead, spoke to him out of a blinding light! “Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting Me?”
When he was led into the city, still blinded, the Lord sent one of those followers he was about to imprison, to pray for him. Jesus told Paul that he would do God’s will from there on and suffer in the footsteps of his Lord. Paul always remembered that it was him who persecuted God’ people. He knew that it was just because of the grace of the Lord Jesus that he could also belong to the Lord and work for Him. He slowly realized that God’s plans had been made long before his own, even long before his birth!
So the Lord Jesus turned a champion of religious law into a servant of grace. He would tell people everywhere that there is no way we can earn our inheritance in heaven, because that is God’s gracious gift, a gift which changes the receiver to become like the Giver, Jesus Christ.
From Damascus, Paul journeyed to Arabia and back to Damascus. He was still not ready to meet with those who were apostles before him. Only after three years did he go to Jerusalem, where he stayed for two weeks with Peter. For Paul, it was very important to mention this part of his life, because he wanted to make clear that it was God Himself who called him and not merely other people, that the Gospel he preached came from Christ Himself.
At that time, he didn’t meet a lot of believers. They only heard that the man who tried to destroy them, was now bringing the same message they believed in. Paul then journeyed on to Syria and Cilicia where he made friends with Barnabas and a non-Jewish believer, Titus. The three of them returned to Jerusalem only fourteen years afterwards. Although Titus was not a Jew, no one tried to force Jewish customs upon him. Paul had only one question to ask from James, Cephas and John: “Am I on the right track?” “Yes!”, they replied “Peter will preach the Gospel to the Jews and you go preach it to the non-Jews.” Then they gave him a firm handshake with the words: “We will not make things difficult for you. Just remember – we have some poor people here, please help us look for support.”
* * *
A Very Clear Message Delivered to Galatia
Paul went his way. What happened afterwards, from the time he arrived in the northern town of Antioch, till he and Barnabas were sent out from there, all their journeys, is told in the Book of Acts.
On one of their travels, Paul, with Silas and Timothy, came to Galatia in the highlands of Anatolia around the modern city of Ankara in Turkey. From Acts 16:6, it seems that the Holy Spirit guided them very specifically to go to Galatia. The people of Galatia were Gauls – family of today’s French – who settled there and became the ruling class three centuries before Jesus was born. Later, they became part of the Roman empire and were respected as a nation of famous fighters. The Galatians prayed to several gods and built temples for them.
As soon as Paul arrived in Galatia, he started to tell people the Good News about Jesus Christ: that God gave His Son to make people of all nations heirs of his kingdom. He convinced them that idols represent gods that don’t actually exist, weak and poor spiritual ideals that make slaves of those who serve them. He assured them that faith in Jesus Christ was the only way to accept God’s gracious gift of freedom.
Almost as soon as he started preaching, however, he fell ill. What would the idol-worshipping Galatians make of his illness? Would they despise and reject such a weak messenger? His fears were unfounded: they accepted him almost as if they accepted Jesus Himself! They would have provided him with everything he needed! They believed his message and received the freedom it brought with extreme joy.
For the Galatians, the message was as clear as if Jesus was crucified right before their eyes.
Paul and his helpers stayed there for a while, before they left for Greece. During that short time, a Christian church was established in Galatia.
* * *
Proselyte-Makers Arrive
Frowning, Paul presses hard on his feather pen. He uses large handwriting. Back in home-base Antioch, he’s writing to the Galatian church. What then is wrong?
He just got news that some Jewish Christians from Jerusalem made their way to distant Galatia. With what purpose?
According to the Old Covenant, people who did not physically descend from Abraham were allowed to become part of God’s people, on condition that they were circumcised and immersed in water to purify them. Then they had to obey the whole law, especially about twenty-five regulations pertaining to them. Since the Diaspora of Jews all over the world about seven hundred years before Jesus was born, some Jewish preachers went about to convince non-Jews to follow the religion of Judaism. Such converts were then called “proselytes.” So these Jewish Christians from Jerusalem travelled to Galatia to make proselytes of the people who had just come to faith in Jesus Christ.
They convinced the Galatians that Paul’s message wasn’t complete, that they had to try to obey all the laws as a way to be accepted by God. Especially, they were told that they, as non-Jews, had to be circumcised. The Galatians fell for it. They started observing days and months and seasons. Paul realized that the Galatians were exchanging the work of God’s Spirit for human effort, freedom for slavery, sonship of God for becoming religious converts.
We remember the words the Lord Jesus once spoke to the Pharisees: “you travel over land and sea to make one convert, but then you make that person a child of hell, worse than yourselves.”
As Paul rolls up the parchment on which he had written and sends it with the swiftest runner he can find, he feels a bit like a woman in labour, with the Galatian church the baby that just doesn’t want to come to a proper birth. He told them that much in his letter: that he wanted nothing more than that Christ should be born in their lives.
* * *
Paul explains the Good News by telling the story of Abraham
It was a hard time for Paul. How could the Galatians allow themselves to be deluded so easily, so soon? How could those people from Jerusalem go add things to the Gospel that the apostles agreed not to add? How could people meddle in with the beautiful plan God has for the nations?
“Dear Galatians”, he wrote, “there is no other gospel, no news that is worthy to be called Good News. Even if I myself or an angel from heaven should bring you another message, let that person be cursed!” He then tells them the Gospel all over.
Paul starts his Gospel story with the father of all believers, Abraham.
When there was still no Jewish nation, God called Abraham to go where He would lead him. God gave him a promise: “I will give you a land of your own”. He also promised: “I will be your God and make you a father of many nations, in you I will bless all nations”.
God made a covenant with Abraham in which He took all the requirements upon Himself. What did Abraham do? He believed in God. Because of his faith, God accepted him. In this way, God opened the way for people from all nations to be accepted by their faith.
God also promised Abraham that “a descendant” of him would inherit everything that was promised. Abraham and Sarah however thought God was taking too long to give them a child, so, out of doubt rather than faith, Abraham fathered a child with the slave woman Hagar. But that descendant, Ishmael, wasn’t the true heir of the promise. The promise belonged to Abraham’s wife, the free woman Sarah, and her child Izaak. The promise of God always belongs to those who believe in God and is not a matter of natural descent.
Many years passed and the family of Abraham became a big nation. Later they became slaves in Egypt, but God freed them and led them to the land He’d promised Abraham long ago.
On the way there, at Mount Sinai, God gave them the Law. That was called the Sinai Covenant. By doing the law, they would live.
The purpose of the law was to make them learners. They were to learn to live in God’s presence. As soon as they started trusting the law to try to save themselves, forgetting that the promise was pointing to One who had to come, they rather enslaved themselves. The law could never make someone fully acceptable to God, because none of us is perfect. So the law, which is good, brought a curse: no one could perfectly do it and in that way have life.
So the promise was God’s only lasting agreement with his people.
The law only functioned as a teacher, or rather a caretaker. Up till the time when Jesus came, the people of Israel were like minors in God’s house: what was promised belonged to them, but they could still not have it. They could only have it when Abraham’s Descendant, Jesus Christ would come.
Jesus was the perfect Descendant of Abraham, to whom the promise belonged.
He fully obeyed God’s perfect law, in life and death, not only by the letter, but by the spirit. He fulfilled the true meaning of the law. When He gave Himself up in death, He took the curse of the law upon himself and in that way removed it.
Since Jesus came, everyone who believes in Him, receives the Holy Spirit by whom God’s law is written on the believer’s heart and mind. Who believes in Him, becomes a child of God and calls God her or his very own Father. That’s the beginning of the inheritance received. That’s the promise came true.
All people who live by faith – from whatever nation, slave or free, men or women – are now children of Abraham. More than that: children of God and heirs of the everlasting promise.
* * *
It was a hard time for Paul. He felt that his wounds were the wounds of Jesus. So he also asked the Galatian church some hard questions: how could you so soon become disloyal to us, who brought you the Good News? Don’t you realize that those people who want to convince you to observe the law, are trying to separate you from us? Remember that the Lord Jesus warned against the “yeast”, the spreading influence, of the Pharisees. They want to have you who believe in Jesus to be circumcised, as if Jesus, the Descendant, never came, as if the Promise was never fulfilled, as if we never were set free from our own effort as a way to be accepted by God!
“If we are one with Jesus, circumcision doesn’t matter at all. What matters to God, is faith – faith that leads to deeds of love. What is important, is to be a new creature altogether!”
* * *
The people of Galatia grew up spending their time, money, effort and trust on idols. Later they got to know the Gospel, but soon some misguided people almost had them forget about their new found freedom.
All people are sinful at heart. Neither appeasing idols or trying to get in right standing with God by obeying the law, can change a person’s heart.
The Good News is that God forgave those who believe in Jesus Christ, made them heirs of the promise and dear children of God. God gives them the promised Holy Spirit, who changes a person from the inside.
So Paul had to explain this to the Galatians:
The law of God is good and eternal and the heart of the law is this: love God with all you have and are, and love others as yourself. As humans, however, we still have to reckon with our own selfish nature:
If we allow our human nature to do as it wishes, we will abuse our freedom, break the law and do selfish things, like idolatry and magic, jealousy, envy and anger. But then we lose our freedom and our place in God’s Kingdom.
The solution is to let the Spirit of God have its way: like a tree that bears fruit without having to try, the Spirit makes us produce love, joy, and peace, patience, friendliness and goodness, trust, humility and self-control. These things that come from inside a person, is the New Covenant made visible, proof that the promise still holds, the only way to do what the law requires.
The death of Jesus on the cross means that for me who believe, my selfish human nature had been crucified.
* * *
For the Galatians, the results of trying to believe in Jesus while at the same time doing all that the Sinai Covenant required, were probably not good: Paul mentioned people who were at each other’s throats. Would they try to outdo each other, mutually destroy each other, make a mockery of the church and the Good Message?
So Paul pointed them once more to the core meaning of the Law: love, as you love yourself. Apply it in everyday life: Humbly help each other, be your best without comparing yourself to others, do good to all people – especially your fellow-believers.
Even more than Paul’s heartbeat, we feel the heartbeat of the Lord Jesus in the letter to the Galatians. Whether by means of body language, like eating on the same table with people who differ from us, or by sharing our material possessions with those who minister the Word to us, or by having the understanding and humility to counsel others who are having it difficult – it’s the Holy Spirit who is active and displaying the completed work of Jesus Christ through those who believe.
Locating The Right Wedding Band In Edinburgh
Having a jazz band in Scotland is really hot currently and this fad is responsible for lots of typical wedding bands in Scotland to add some jazz to this repertoire. If you can certainly ask your normal wedding band to learn specific jazz songs, you will likely pay them extra to rehearse the tracks. They’ll have to rehearse for a little bit so it shall be perfect as soon as they play at your wedding party. If you would like jazz at all, it is probably advisable to hire a jazz band in Scotland instead of trying to find a standard band that’s prepared to run through jazz tracks.
When you start the process of finding the best wedding band Scotland for your wedding event, you should be sure they’re going to be capable of play both new and old tracks to get people at your wedding party keen on dancing. Live music can be very fun to dance to, particularly when it has a solid fast speed. Even though you end up picking a jazz or celidh band, that clearly doesn’t suggest your guests won’t often be moving or enjoying themselves. In some cases quite contrary. A wedding band in Scotland can really rouse people to get up and dance.
You need to be meeting with a variety of bands and artists to hear the things they are able to do for you personally before signing up with any of them. You need to get a sample of their sounds and a sample set of some of the tunes they perform. Almost any band you end up picking will be able to work together with you to acquire the suitable songs list that you’ll be imagining. They will not just give you a few recommendations on just what works best at wedding receptions, but the band should really be prepared to listen to a few of your ideas to boot. A great wedding band Scotland will probably be the one which has good testimonials with others and it has a track record that precedes them. Speaking with friends or family who’ve had live bands is a good way to get the best band for you personally.
Using a band for your wedding reception can definitely make the day or night go smoothly. Your guests will take cues from your band and you ought to often decide on a band that would represent the kind of party or celebration you might have dreamed of for your personal wedding reception.
Male Engagement Ring – A Symbol of Commitment
By tradition, social norms dictate that it is not expected for a man to go about wearing an engagement ring as a token of commitment to his special woman. This can be attributed to the fact that jewelry has been associated more with women than men. Apart from that, there is also the impression that showing off one’s emotional attachment to a relationship makes an individual appear to be less than a man, an emotional babe so to speak. The fact, however, is that there are a lot of men who have their eyebrows and ears pierced, have their birth stones studded into metal frames, and some even wear wrist bands. If they can do these things, then surely it would not be much of an issue if they wear a token to show their commitment to a woman, especially so since doing such would definitely please her as well as make her feel important, special, and really loved.
In cultures where a woman as a general rule is expected to propose to a man, wearing a male engagement ring is almost synonymous with marriage ritual itself. In fact, it is considered so solemn that a ceremony is observed just for the purpose of putting the ring on the concerned man’s finger. On such an occasion, the man is dressed up like he is already a bridegroom. Once the ring has been worn by the man, it is considered as a symbol of his being bound to a woman for the rest of his life. It is sad to note, however, that some men just fail to have a complete grasp of the ring’s essence and meaning, putting it off aside once the ceremony is over and done.
Thanks to this particular tradition, however, jewelers have come to produce and maintain separate jewelry line for men, which includes the male engagement ring. So although a lot of men are still hesitant to transcend the limits of convention by wearing such a kind of ring, the fact is that they are already into wearing jewelry, so there is no reason that should prevent them from wearing a male engagement ring.
The movie “The Twilight Saga” showcase an example of how extraordinarily traditional men can be when it comes to their relationships with women. Throughout the movie, Edward carried a ring in his pocket for Bella. Never did it occur to him that Bella might have wanted for him to have a proof of loyalty in his fingers, too, although he already had a rebuttal from Bella when she stated “I am all yours already”. This shows the cultural bias where women are expected to show their loyalty to men, while men are not expected at all to show proof of this sort.
In this regard, the trend of T.V. serials or movies from the US showing couples wearing identical bands which signify a bond of trust in relationships is quite intriguing. Emotionally speaking, it would be more satisfying if we can see two identical rings peeping out of a couples’ interlocking fingers.
How To Propose To a Girl
Before you decide on your entourage, caterers and simple wedding rings, you should obviously first ask for your girlfriend’s hand in marriage. Most girls who have been in a relationship for a long time with their significant others, usually, secretly wish for this romantic moment to happen. Don’t ruin it for them by not planning well and what’s even worse is, some guys think that a formal engagement is not needed. Girls may not directly say it to their boyfriends, but they would want this occasion to be memorable, something that they can share with their friends, and maybe even children and grandchildren someday. Buying contemporary rings are very exciting, but before you do that, make sure that you purchase an engagement ring first. To make your proposal special, here are some tips that can help you:
• Proposals can be anything that you want it to be. It could be a trip to your girlfriend’s favorite place or to the place where the both of you first met or became a couple, a reenactment of your first date, a special party and so on. As much as possible, make the occasion as special and as personal and original as possible.
• Before your proposal, make sure that you have consulted with and asked the approval of her family. Having their consent ahead of time will make things easier for the both of you. Aside from that, doing this will also be a sign of respect to her family. It will be good to maintain a pleasant relationship with your girlfriend’s family.
• Try to keep it a surprise and be subtle with your plans. If you need help, ask her family and close friends. Having an extra hand to help you will allow you to accomplish your task smoothly. A little participation and support from your girlfriend’s family and close friends will make the occasion more special for her.
• Make it extra special by doing things that you don’t normally do. If you don’t normally sing, try to learn her favorite song and sing it to her. You can also take time to cook a special meal for the occasion. Try to go out of your way and do something that you have never done before. This is, after all, a once in a lifetime experience. Your girlfriend will surely be touched if you will do something like that.
• See to it that everything is in place on the day that you plan to propose to her. Follow up your orders from any services you may have obtained, so that you won’t cram and bring stress to yourself. Try to look into all of the details carefully to avoid glitches. You just might get a big “yes” once she sees all of the effort that you have put in.
• Pick out a contemporary ring that will suit the personality of your girlfriend. There are a lot of options in the market. Make sure you select something that is appropriate for her lifestyle, so that she won’t have any reasons to take it off.
Being engaged to someone is the first step to marriage. This is a meaningful occasion for you and your girlfriend as a couple, so make sure that you make good memories out it. It doesn’t have to be expensive or grand; it just needs to be personal and romantic – something that you can both enjoy together as a couple. Your engagement will be the best time to celebrate the first step of your commitment together!
Hens Just Wanna Have Fun Posted By: Martin Brown
Firstly, the queen hen must be loved like a mother goose, so why not get her? Her very own diamante table sign complete with a shot glass wedding ring, after all, the pure cygnet is the queen swan and proud of it. If thats not enough, how about adorning her with her own Bride to be Glasses complete with matching sash. As the belle of the ball, she should not go out without her Hot Pink Glow Stick and Dial a Dare necklace. Her Hen Night Accessories would not be complete without her Willy wine charm and glow in the dark Willy earrings. For that finishing touch, a bottle of bubbles will surely go down well, and dont forget the pair of drinking straw glasses to quench that insatiable thirst. We have all the Hen Night Accessories you will need for upstaging the stag night strippers; let your feathers get ruffled and strut your stuff.
Now, with the queen hen necessaries are laid bare, lets get those real Hen Night Accessories out. We mean drinking hand bells, Willy whistles to wet the lips and of course, if you really want to get noticed by any nervous looking waiter worth his salt, how about a giant inflatable Willy to raise the attention levels. Lets keep the spirits up with a male blow up doll, inoffensive of course. Keep the party rolling, and leave them rolling in the aisles. The ring for a kiss bell will surely help pin the cucumber on the hunk. We have a full coop of light hearted gifts to keep the girls a gabble, so why not slip in a few naughty games to liven up any quiet hen, and see whos top of the of the pecking order. Our Hen Night Accessories aim to please, simply try our jumbo Willy straw with a double shot neon Willy shooter glass.
Rule the roost and make it truly memorable night with our hen night memento book for jotting down any of the nights little flights of fancy. Our Hen Night Accessories will add that extra peck to ruffle the fullest of feathers. We have all the extra tit bits for the girls to take home and preen over with that special souvenir of the night. So, bring it home to roost and enjoy your special night with us and make it spectacular.
And Now, the Engagement Ring!
The hardest part is over: You’ve found your soul mate; that special someone with whom you would like to spend the rest of your life. WOW, that sounds really huge! So now the quest for something special that will symbolize your relationship and commitment you’ve given one to another begins. There is no pattern for emotions, for relationships and of course, each is unique and that something has to be as unique as the love that unties you two. If you’re still confused and not sure what exactly I’m talking about here is the answer: the engagement ring.
In Ancient Egypt, circle symbolized never ending cycle and it is where and when the story of engagement band began. And if you were wondering why the band should be placed on the fourth finger of the left hand, again Ancient Egyptians have an answer, since that’s where they were placing it because they believed fourth finger has a vein that is leading to the heart. Even the name of the vein is “vein of love” (or vena amoris). Sure, we know now that’s not the case but tradition remained and nevertheless I found the story behind it quite lovely and romantic. And besides, it safer not to mess with the ghosts of Ancient Egyptians.
Later, Romans continued but the meaning of the ring they gave was not as romantic. They were the sign of possession. Greeks used them as well but the role of the engagement ring we know today started when Pope Innocent III in 13th century established a waiting period in between a marriage proposal or promise and the wedding ceremony. The engagement band of course was representing couple’s devotion to on another during that time.
But before engagement ring came into our modern culture with the role it has now ring was not what boys, men gave to their chosen ones. Not so long ago, before 20th century, betrothal gifts other than the ring were quite common. Among them the most usual one was a sewing thimble (girls, how do you like that?). Especially during Colonialism in America. Later, women would remove the top of the thimble and make a ring out of it. So there you go! I’m wondering, how would look a diamond encrusted thimble?
Speaking about diamonds, first engagement diamond ring has been given to Marry of Burgundy by Archduke Maximilian of Austria in 1477 and now, five centuries later according to some statistics 80% of American couples are Marry and Maximilian alike. Once diamonds in the ring signified status of wealth of the groom to be, considering they were affordable only to a small portion of aristocracy. Nowadays, the situation is quite different because not only those with deepest pockets can have them. Being utterly beautiful and in the same time accessible while practically indestructible, diamonds are nowadays associated as a symbol of eternal love.
Choosing the perfect engagement ring with or without a diamond is of course a big deal and it could be a bit challenging but it surely doesn’t have to be a dreadful experience. It is definitively a unique quest if you are searching for a unique ring, that you’ll not find in jeweler’s catalogue. There is no same relationship and it’s understandable that couples are keen on finding equally unique ring for their engagement. So if we know that diamonds are not unique (we mentioned that 80% of women in America are offered diamond engagement ring?) one can try with some unusual, uncommon gemstones like aquamarine (my personal favourite) or tanzanite if you prefer deeper blue or something completely different. There are so many options. Hey and when I said diamonds are hardly uncommon I didn’t mean they should be dismissed. Never dismiss a diamond! There are many rings with certain patterns and with different gems so they are fantastic rings with diamonds that put an accent to a central stone. Remember the engagement ring of Lady Diana (and later of Kate Middleton; it’s the same ring by the way) with sapphire surrounded with diamonds? It’ utterly beautiful ring and yes, the price is equally jaw dropping but of course you don’t have to spend $300.000. It’s just a nice illustration in defense of diamonds.
You can choose some unusual form of the gemstones. It doesn’t have to be round or square.
Now by choosing uncommon metal one can add to uniqueness of the ring. Titanium is beautiful and uncommon as well as tungsten is. The latter one is quite rare and I might add strange choice if you know its other name (Wolfram) and usage: in the incandescent light bulb filaments (speaking about shining the love light). Now gold of course, but you might think what uncommon in gold? Well there are several colours in which gold appears. Why not choose one not seen as often? Oh and definitively consider Japanese Mokume-gane. That especially if you decide that both, woman and man wear the ring (there are some couples who do that and there are some cultures where that is everything but uncommon) because mokume-gane is quite popular for male rings. And no way you’ll miss with it on the field of uniqueness either, because you can’t make two identical rings.
Patterns, yes it can be tricky to find a unique one. Eternal knots in the Celtic style can look interesting; there is an option of engraving something “Lord-Of-The-Ring-ish” as well.
Whichever piece of that small something you pick it will be an amazing and unique because it will be the beginning of the new life together and reminding of the beautiful, unique past you share.
Depression Counseling, Marriage Counseling, And Mindfulness Counseling Posted By: Christopher Diggins
The truth is seeking depression counselingdoes not mean you are a failure. It means you refuse to give up. It means you will take any means necessary to feel better. You are dedicating time to yourself because you deserve to feel better. A licensed counselor is also dedicated to helping you feel better.
Many counselors have begun to practice mindfulness counseling. This means they are getting you in touch with your deepest feelings. They get you to recognize the feelings that you have hidden away for so long and deal with them, whether they are good or bad. Recognizing those feelings lets you deal with them and move on.
Mindfulness counselingis often done through not only therapy, but also through meditation. Mediation allows you to access the hidden places in your mind and heart. It puts you in a peaceful state by elevating your energy and tapping into feelings you have forgotten you have. It allows you to begin your healing process.
Sometimes counselors will use mindfulness counseling in relationship counseling as well. It helps you to better open yourself up to your partner and your feelings towards your partner. It allows your true feelings to come out. This vulnerability is sometimes what is lacking in a relationship.
Repairing a relationship is not just about the individuals involved. It is also about how those individuals react with each other. Marriage counseling will help those individuals learn to communicate with each other again. It allows people to express their feelings in a secure environment where they will not be judged.
Often people feel judged in a relationship, and that is what shuts down communication. People are afraid to speak their feelings because they are afraid their feelings will be judged. In marriage counseling, people are reminded that they do not have to be judged and they should be free to express their feelings in a way that does not blame their partner.
Regardless of the type of therapy you are looking for, deciding to seek therapy is the first step in healing. Whether you are seeking depression counseling or therapy for your marriage, speaking with a license professional can make a world of difference. It can turn despair into hope and tears into joy.
Christopher Diggins, MA, LMHC
1424 NE 155th St #206, Shoreline
Langley/Island County, WA,